Monday, 21 December 2009

I'm a Failure.

A monumental one. By that I mean they should put up a monument of me and write in BOLD letters:

"To the most failing failure: you fail."

I've been struggling with myself lately. (I don't know, Mom, is it the shorter days? What is with this?) It seems like the harder I try, the less I accomplish, and the more I want to do, the less I get done. It seems like when I finally finish something, it's not finished well, or it leaves me with a bitter taste in my mouth; a sense that I could have done it better. If only, if only, if only...

The hard truth is that I fail.
I'm not what I should be. I'm not what I'm supposed to be.

Here, though, is where the amazing truth comes in.

I'm not what I once was. I'm not what I have been.
God is so gracious. Everything that I am not is found in Christ. All of my sin - all of my failure - is gone. All of Christ's righteousness is given to me. God looks at me, and He does not see a failure. He sees His child. He sees His perfect one.

His love is not based upon what I accomplish. It is not up to my successes - or my failures.

I can't understand that. It is too wonderful for me to grasp.

I imagine sometimes, though, what it will be like when that great and terrible day comes.
Just think; because of Christ, we can come before God with confidence. We can draw near to the throne of grace without fear.

I like to imagine that I will walk up to the throne with smiling eyes, because I'll see Jesus there - and He will have smiling eyes too. Not by my own might, not by my own success, will I be so free. It is only because of Jesus.

If ever there were a monument set up to remember my failures, the inscription should not be what I mentioned above; rather, it should be something like this:

"She was a failure.
But she was a failure saved by grace, loved by God, and redeemed by Christ."

To Him be the glory, both now and forevermore.

Tuesday, 15 December 2009

Interesting Song

"Christmas Must Be Something More" - Taylor Swift



What if ribbons and bows didn't mean a thing
Would the song still survive without five golden rings
Would you still wanna kiss without misletoe
What would happen if God never let it snow
What would happen if Christmas carols told a lie
Tell me what would you find

You'd see that today holds something special
Something holy, not superficial
So here's to the birthday boy who saved our lives
It's something we all try to ignore
And put a wreath up on your door
So here's something you should know that is for sure
Christmas must be something more

What if angels did not pay attention to
All the things that we wished they would always do
What if happiness came in a cardboard box
Then I think there is something we all forgot
What would happen if presents all went away
Tell me what would you find

You'd see that today holds something special
Something holy, not superficial
So here's to the birthday boy who saved our lives
It's something we all try to ignore
And put a wreath up on your door
So here's something you should know that is for sure
Christmas must be something more

We get so caught up in all of it
Business and relationships
Hundred mile an hour lives
And it's this time of year
And everybody's here
It seems the last thing on your mind

Is that the day holds something special
Something holy, not superficial
So here's to Jesus Christ who saved our lives
It's something we all try to ignore
And put a wreath up on your door
But here's something you should know that is for sure
Christmas must be something
Christmas must be something
Christmas must be something more

There's gotta be more
There's gotta be more